Bye Bye Monday...

Oh Monday...It's only 1:45pm and I am ready for you to be over. Today has been a day of testing for me and I'm pretty sure I'm failing...miserably. I was super excited to begin this week with a fresh set of toys out for the kids, including some pretty awesome, planned activities for today. Then they woke up...whiny and grumpy. UGH. I went forward with my plans to go to a library story time for toddlers. I thought it may be nice for all of us to just get out of the house.

I should have known based on their moods this morning that it was a bad idea. Everything started out okay. But then the librarian began to read a book...which is what toddler story time is for, right!? :) Both of my children cannot sit still to save their lives. The moment she began reading, they turned their backs to the book and started playing behind them. They were being quiet, so I didn't correct the behavior. Though I inwardly felt discouraged as I looked around at all of the other toddlers sitting perfectly still listening attentively to the story. UGH.

Isaac and Naomi decided they were done before the toddler time was officially over, but I kept them in the room for as long as I could. Then it was craft time. I LOVE crafts and crafty things. My children...not so much. :( I think they may have gotten their daddy's genes on this one, as neither of them seem to really enjoy artsy or crafty things. While it may not be in their nature, I will continue to be committed to nurturing it within them!! :) Today they lasted all of five minutes and were finished with their craft.

I was trying to clean up their mess when Isaac decided to leave the room without asking. I grabbed my diaper bad and purse and left promptly, with Naomi by my side. I couldn't see Isaac anywhere, so I asked Naomi to follow me so we could find him. She disobeyed and went in the opposite direction and decided that it would be a good idea to empty a shelf of books onto the floor. UGH! I ran over to clean up her mess, which I normally would have had her do, but given that books go a certain way in the shelf, I just did it myself. I caught her and told her that she lost her privilege of being able to walk around on her own since she did not listen to and obey mommy.

But WHERE was my son? After much searching (it was actually probably only a minute and a half, but it felt like FOREVER)...I finally found him at one of the computers. I asked him to come with me as I started walking toward the exit. He ran toward me, then did what every parent dreads: he folded his arms, pouted his lips, and yelled, "NO! I don't WANT to go!" And when I say yelled...I mean YELLED. And we're in a library...a quiet library. It was awful. I was SO embarrassed.

I pointed at the ground below me, gave him "the eye" and mouthed, "Get over here, NOW." He obeyed and began walking toward me, but yelled at me the ENTIRE way. I knelt down and told him that we absolutely could NOT stay because he was breaking a library rule...we are not allowed to yell in the library. I tried to hold his hand and assist him out with me, but he yanked it back, shouting at me again that he did NOT want to leave. I ignored him as we walked out of the library. He continued yelling and whining and so I let him know that he would be receiving a consequence when we got to the car. He received a spanking and lost all TV privileges for the rest of the day.

He eventually stopped whining on the way home and began talking about his yelling "episode" at the library, asking me why he did that. LOL. I should have had more grace as I talked with him because it could have been a wonderful teachable moment. But instead, I was rather short with him...trying to help him realize that I was NOT pleased with his behavior. We could have talked about feelings and what are good ways of dealing with our feelings when we're feeling frustrated about a situation. We could have discussed other ways he could have dealt with his feelings at the library. But sadly that conversation didn't happen because I was sulking in embarrassment...and if I'm being completely honest...my own anger.

We made it home and the grumpiness continued all around. Quick lunches and then naps. Except for as I am writing this now, my oh-so-lovely 3-year-old son continues to refuse to take a nap. He's been in his room for over an hour now, but is not even close to falling asleep. He's happily singing songs and making up stories...and occasionally yelling for me or kicking the wall. This day needs to be over...SOON. I want to scrap all of my ideas that I had planned for him today and just escape in a book or online. But I just can't.

Instead, I think I'll go spend a few minutes meeting with the Lord...and praying for my afternoon to go MUCH better. I'm going to confess my angry, tired spirit...and ask for Him to change my heart to be one full of grace and love...and peace. I am SO weak...I can't do this on my own strength! But I am SO thankful that I have Someone who is ALWAYS here to help me. :)