Thankful Thursday

It happened. I lost one of my kids. It was only for 5-10 minutes, but it felt like an eternity. And I am thankful for a lot of things, but first, let me share how this all happened. As with many days, I began my day before the sun came up...in a time of worship and prayer. I love starting my days like this, as it sets the tone for the rest of my day. This morning, my time was cut short due to early wake-up times from my beautiful children. :)

But even while they were awake, I continued in prayer...asking God what He wanted us to do during the day. I know I wanted to get out of the house with the kiddos. I just didn't know where. I liked the idea of free, so the Children's Museum, the mall, and the library were all the best prospects. I made the mistake of mentioning them to Isaac and he began to obsess over going to the museum. So I told him that we'd go. But even while we were on our way, I asked God where we should go. I kept hearing, "the mall," but I wrestled with the idea of disappointing Isaac. I wasn't in the mood to deal with a grumpy 3-year-old who didn't want to go where I thought God was telling me to go. So I followed my own (and more so, Isaac's) agenda and we went to the museum.

As we pulled up to the museum, the traffic was unreal. I thought, "Oh great...it's crazy busy." I had no idea just HOW busy until we got inside. WOW. I've never seen a place more packed. I know that by the time we left, it was AT capacity. And inside, it felt like it was slightly BEYOND capacity. (See photo above)

After poking into two or three different exhibits (but leaving shortly after because they were too busy), we headed down to the food court to eat our packed lunch. Naomi was in a high chair across the table from me, and Isaac was sitting in the seat to my left. We were nearing the end of the meal, and I was helping Naomi finish up when I turned to ask Isaac something. But he was gone. Just like that. I looked around, to see if I could see him running around a corner or hiding from me. He was not. One second he was sitting peacefully beside me, the next he was nowhere to be found.

I left Naomi at the table (within eyesight) while I walked around the food court. I began looking at all of the mommies at the tables around us, trying to get some sort of read as to whether anyone saw my son leave. No one acknowledged me. No one was aware of my distress. A few minutes had passed at this point, so I put away our lunch, got Naomi into the stroller, and headed out. I was outwardly calm, but my heart was sinking. Where did he go? Why would he do this? Maybe I should notify someone who works here. So as I was looking for Isaac, I was simultaneously looking for ANYone who could help me. There were no museum employees around that weren't already up to their knees in work, helping other people. Okay. I don't need them anyway, right?

So I began to pray. I didn't even know what words to pray, so I just prayed in the Spirit. Lead me to him, Lord. Help me, PLEASE! I continued fighting back my tears...but they were so close to just pouring out. Then I remembered that Isaac had talked about wanting to see the dinosaur exhibit. Maybe he headed down there? So I started heading that way, and as I began walking down the ramp, I heard his voice yelling, "MOOOOMMMMMMY!" He was grinning as he was being chased down/escorted by a VERY helpful museum employee. I thanked her, then my first words to my son: "Where have you BEEN?" She said that he came up to her and said that he lost his mommy. She asked him where he last saw me, and he told her and led her to the food court. The timing was just right because he happened to spot me as I was about to pass them going in the opposite direction. :)

We left immediately and Isaac got an ear-full about why it is not okay to leave my side. I gave him the whole "bad guys" talk. I talked to him about how it's my job as his mommy to keep him safe, but when he runs off and does his own thing, I can't help him or protect him. I warned him that if he runs off like that, someone could snatch him away and that we'd never see him again. And I let him know how sad that would make us. I wanted him to realize that it is never, ever okay for him to do this again. I hope it sinks in.

And as I was driving home, the Lord spoke to me again. He tenderly told me, "I tried to warn you. But you left my side. You went out on your own and experienced the consequences that I KNEW you were going to experience. I tried protecting you from this whole experience, but you chose to do your own thing." It could have been A LOT worse. I am SO thankful that Isaac is okay. And I am praising God for showing me how my own choices were very similar to my son's today. I am definitely taking this lesson and letting it sink in. And by God's grace, I hope to never leave His side again!